I started to blog on early 2004.
During my golden time in Uni. Not much to talk/type back then.. just some 'poyo' stuffs.. eventho poyo, i keep my nose on running it well and maintain it until i decided to stop sometimes in 2006. Here I am now, deleting all those posts and decided to start fresh again.. =)
I've deleted all my posts from 2004 until 2006. But I'm keeping one post as a draft. Today I decided to talk about this post. it relates to my past and future..and i've tasted my own med..huhu
Published on 30th Aug 2004..
Just now, I surfed construction company based in S*****k. May be I'll end up having my internship there huhu. Will my parent allow me to go there? I think they will allow me but how about he? Will he allow me going there alone? Going to place where there's no H/p coverage, no huha huha thingy, shoppes closed at 9 pm bla2.. I think I should asked myself what I really want, rite? I always wanted to go to somewhere I could easily ride my life with. Slow flow, not hectic at all, not so urban but not too rural place. K**** will be a nice place, i think, i think.. keep on dreaming girl ! ( dun forgot to wake up :p)
I've wrote this before my internship. Berangan to stay away from home and Husband (my bf back then) so all of them will miss me more and more. hehe Yep, it's childish and unmatured of me.. but that was few years back..
It's so true that God will always granted your wish/es.. it's just a matter of time.. lambat or cepat.. For my case, going to S****k (it's not in my wishlist, but it happened anyway) and being away from family seems like a cool business..(I dun know what am I thinking back then.. ) you're on your own foot, in a strange land, with mixed cultures, and a nice flow work schedule, it seems like a a good bargain to me..
But it was vice versa.. I cud not adapt myself with the environment neither the work schedule. It was too hectic to handle and everyday was full with frustration over works.. tonnes of work.. it's killing me.. at least, if my family and Husband were there to support me, I won't be that crazy kot.. the distance, the loneliness, the boss mixed with my complex thoughts really made me makan ati everyday.. I was wrong.. it was totally different from what i've expected..
Husband always reminds me that "the other side will not be as greener as we think.." I thought by going to there, the future will served me better, but i was wrong, I cud not take the job, the environment, etc no more and I'm deeply sinking instead of swimming over the whole thing..I've learned that you must be thankful for everything you've got now and never to compare yourself with anybody else. Never asked for things to be easier, but you yourself has to be better.. Never ask God why like this, why like that, stop all your complaints and start to live your life..
Im really glad that period was over (i kept praying everyday to come back to base..)
Alhamdulilah.. it was a nightmare.. and it's over now.. you can wake up now dear.. =)